Growing Apart

I have had a lot of great friends in my day. Some are still around in some capacity, some are not, but all of them have given something to me that even absence couldnt take away. I value my relationships, and I learn a lot from them. Over the years, they've taught me patience, they've taught me acceptance, they've taught me trust, and, unfortunately though not, sometimes they have taught me to let go.

I'm in a place right now where I feel myself growing apart from a couple of people. I've been feeling this way for a while and I think it might be time for me to stop fighting it. Experience has taught me that sometimes the best way to preserve a friendship is to fall back from it. People grow in different directions and you have to allow it. Failing to do so may not only hinder your friend's growth, but also stunt your own, and isnt life all about progression? Isnt that what TRUE friendship is about?

We spend a lot more than our adolescence learning who we are - its a constant process we're in for our entire lives. There come points when you look around and dont recognize or necessarily like your surroundings, and decide they need to change. Making that change might also mean cutting such close ties with people who no longer fit into the schematics of who or where you wanna be. Likewise, when you see THEM becoming someone or something of their own, and you begin feeling out of place, it might be time to let them move on. That doesnt mean the friendship ends, it just means it changes. It becomes a little less definitive and obligatory than before, which can take some getting used to. But looking back, sometimes its the best - or only - way to preserve the integrity of the relationship you once had, without being obligated to continue it.

Make no mistake - people go through things in their personal lives that temporarily affect their relationships. Sometimes people need time to themselves, or they choose to deal with a personal situation on their own, shutting you and everybody else out until its been handled, or hell, maybe yall just seeing too much of each other and they just need a break from your ass LOL. Damn, can they go chill with their other friends sometimes? LOL My inner circle goes through that all the time LOL. Im not talking about those things. Im talking about a series of indicators over a considerable period of time that you cant break down to anything in particular, because its everything....

So you've come to this conclusion - now what? What do you say? Nothing. Nature will eventually take its course, you just have to let it. If you're standing at the crossroads, chances are good that they are too. If they arent, its even more reason for you to keep it moving. A person who doesnt even acknowldege their own growth being stifled will only serve to further stifle yours.

Growing apart isnt a bad thing. Its necessary for people to become who they need or want to be. Its just hard sometimes when you identify certain aspects of yourself though someone else's presence in your life and you dont want things to change, but understand that in a lot of these cases, if you dont make the necessary adjustments, you run the risk of eventually not being friends at all.