Digfiles: Episode 3....I think LOL

So yall know how I told yall I think the lady at the nail shop wants to bang me, right? Well, actually, now that I think about it, Im not sure I did, but I've said it several times in other spaces. Anyway, I think she wants to bang me LOL.

So I go in there today to get a pedi and have my eyebrows razored. She's giving someone a fill, but asks me what I'm gonna do today. I tell her and she sends the lady who was helping out today to start the water. Im not all that big on having someone working on me who Im not familiar with, because not all of em know what they doing. But I figure I aint got all day, so the least I can do is soak and maybe by the time she's done with the chick next to me, my normal lady would be done with the fill.

The first thing I noticed was that the chick that was next to me (now at the sink, washing her hands) had mad welts and scars on the side of her face. I said DAYUM!! Somebody sliced her shit UP!! Then she moved in front of the mirror on the wall and I see the same shit on the other side of her face. DAYUM!! These were some hellafied keyloids and slashes, so Im wondering WTF happened. Then my mind went back to an incident the whole city was talking about for a while, a few years back, when some girl got into a fight at a local movie theater and got all slashed up about the face. I wondered if it were her, but my impression was that the chick it happened to was younger, so maybe not. IDK, but somebody made sure she was never gonna forget they ass! *smh*

Anyway, the lady tells me to come put my feet in the tub, so I do. She's about to start on Scarface, but Scarface is like "ugh, can I SOAK first???" LMAOOOOOO! Yo, them nail people be cracking me up with that. Unless they are in a real hurry, EVERYBODY wants to soak first. She came over to me and I gave her a look like um, yeah, I wanna soak too. She must be new LOL. She started speaking Korean to my lady, shrugging her shoulders like "what Im posta do?" LOL. Have a seat, shawty, rest your legs for a minute. After a few minutes, she asked if I was ready and Im like Scarface was here first, see if she's ready. Scarface was chillin in the massage chair with her eyes closed, so Betty (Ima call the new jack Betty LOL) didnt wanna ask her. So I motioned with my hand and whispered "just tap her" LOL. Betty looked nervous as hell, but she tapped Scarface on the knee and Scarface said she was cool, just relaxing, so go on and do me.

So Betty pulls up the stool and starts to do my pedicure. I could tell by how slow she was moving that she was either just starting out or it had been a while. My lady (I think her name is Lisa) be like zip, zip, zip LOL. So because Ive come to the conclusion that Betty is new, I gotta keep an eye on her to make sure she aint fuckin up and to make sure she dont cut me or nothing cause then I gotta fuck HER up LOL. She moved hella slow, but she was doing alright, at least from my vantage point. Here comes Lisa (speaking Koream) asking Betty why I didnt turn my massage chair on. Betty lookin like I dont know, shit, ask her why she aint turn it on LOL. Lisa like fuck that, "here, honey" and PUT the remote in my hand like I didnt see it laying on the armrest or something. Then she changed her mind, took the remote back, programmed what SHE felt I needed to have, and handed it back to me when the chair came on LOL. DAMN, son! I cant pick my own massage settings? LOL

Lisa goes back to finish the fill and I go back to hawking Betty. Not long after, Betty's just about done. All there is left to do is the polish - I always get a french manicure because Im kinda anti-nail polish LOL. Now Lisa is saying something to the lady and walking over cause the fill is done. I figured she would let Betty finish me and she'd come do Scarface, but she was like hell nah, get yo ass up, Betty LOL. The part I hate about the nail shop is that Lisa is always saying some shit in Korean and I can always tell when she is talking about me, because whoever she is talking to ALWAYS looks up at me LOL. I be wanting to ask her sometimes what the hell she be saying. Today was no different. Betty looked at me and I figured she told her I was her girlfriend or something LOL. Who the fuck knows LOL.

So now she's picked up the towel and start patting and rubbing my feet and legs with it, way too long for some already-dry legs, and she's inspecting Betty's work. First thing she noticed was a cuticle not fully done. She fixed it. Then she saw some filing that wasnt good enough. She fixed it. When I tell you this woman damn near did my ENTIRE pedicure over, I mean she damn near did LOL. Hey, I aint mad. Get it right. I cant see from this chair, but if I get a closer look and it aint right, you know you doing it over. Naturally, after that, she spent like two weeks rubbing lotion on my legs LOL. I mean, naturally. Dont everybody's nail lady rub their legs that long? LOL HELL. NO. LOL. And I dont know what it is about the leg massaging, if its her eye contact and smile, or what, but she be doing that shit like she's massaging a boob or something. I cant even look at her when she doing it, I feel dirty and there be kids present LMAO!

In the meantime, her husband comes in and we haggle over how thin or thick I want my french, as usual, and then she sends me to the other chair to dry and get my eyebrows done. Her husband recognizes me as a regular, so he always talks to me and today he set up the fan for my toes dry and took my coat and stuff for me. He spent the rest of the time spinning their bad ass lil boy around in a chair, and all I kept thinking was "I hope he spin him right out that bitch" LOL. Bad ass.

Lisa comes over, razor in hand, and starts brushing my hair away from my face with her fingers. *staring* Stop that LOL. Then she goes to slicing and dicing and when its done, I can never tell if I like it in the hand mirror, I always have to walk across the room to the wall mirror. I have to see it from a distance. I follow that routine and sit back down because I want her to cut a little of the ends of my eyebrows. She goes "No." LOL no? WTF you mean no? LOL "I like them long, they look nice nice long" (thats not a typo, she said nice nice LOL) Im like well damn, when did this become about what YOU like? I'd like this shit to be free but we cant all get what we want, can we? LOL Still, I felt naked, cause she was standing in between my legs, with her boobs damn near in my mouth, so I just said okay so she could get offa me LOL.

Im like "Ok, how much is it again?" She rolled her eyes at me. WTF you rollin your eyes at me for? LOL "35" she says. "Really?" I ask. She goes to recounting the services and prices to add them out loud, and Im like "oh the pedi is 25 now?" She started cussin me out LMAO! She started talkin bout how it aint been 22 since they got the new, fancy massagers and how it been so long since I came in for one with her that I forgot and if I came more I would know and she rolled her eyes again LMAOOOOOO! Mind you, it was a playful curse out, not no real live curse out, cause we woulda had a problem then, but that shit sounded like when you run into some guy who got your number over the summer and never called and he asks for your number again and you go to flirting and tellin him how you already gave it to him and he didnt call LOL. On some real shit, I know I was blushing. I had to be, cause that shit was so damn crazy LOL.

I sat to dry a little longer than usual because I wanted to make sure my toes wouldnt smudge. You know, Im goin to see my boo this weekend, so them shits need to be on point LOL. But she never wants me to get up until SHE says so anyway. While she holding me hostage, Im sitting there, and she steady looking at me and smiling, but this is normal fare for her. Then she's saying some shit - again in Korean - and Im just pretending not to hear her cause now Im starting to get annoyed with the shit. Her husband goes "do you know what she said?" Now why the fuck would I know what she said? LOL "No" I said. "She said she loves your eyebrows, they just look so beautiful and she keeps looking back at them." Ok, but you did them shits, you supposed to like em. If nobody like em, you should LOL. I just shook my head and laughed. He left about five minutes later and she got up and went to the mirror to start plucking her own eyebrows. She turned around and saw me watching her pluck and we just both started cracking up. Let me find out you hating on my eyebrows and had to go start fuckin wit yours LOL. Hilarious.

So maybe thats what she keeps saying to people that makes them look at me and thats probably why she be making me get them done, even when its not what Im there for, because she thinks they are her babies LOL. But that dont dammit explain why she always got her thigh all up in my coochie piece when she doing them shits, and why I have to watch her to make sure them leg massages stop at the knee. I dont care bout no eyebrow shit, I think that was her setting up her story early, so when she tries to get me later, I wont be suspicious LOL. Damn shame you gotta worry bout leaving the nail shop molested. *smh*