A friend of mine made a post that said men need to stop complaining about women being in their masculine energy if they are not creating a safe space for their women to occupy their feminine selves. As you might expect, it spurned a whole men vs women debate about blame and all the bullshit we all must be sick of hearing by now, simply because people were focused on proving their point rather than understanding - either side.
An interesting observation I've made is that an empathetic and enlightened man could post the same thing and other men who may disagree will simply scroll by, but the second a WOMAN posts it, here they come, guns blazing. Why are you getting defensive, sir? No one called your name but here you are, present and accounted for. Why are you triggered? No, seriously, I'd really like to know.
While I await the response that isn't coming, let me try to simplify things in the way that seems all the rage these days: math.
1+1=2
BUT
1x1=1
Think of the + as harmony; the give and take, if you will. Each person bringing things to the table, each considering the other and embracing their differences as building blocks to fortify their union. These people seek to understand each other to better see how their pieces fit and smooth the edges so they begin to fit BETTER. The "power" or lead is constantly shifting between the two and "the two" or "greater good" is always the focus.
Now think of the x as competition. When there is no harmony or understanding, people begin to jockey for position. This relationship is ego-driven and tends to breed resentment. Clashes tend to be about who's right and who's wrong - a winner vs a loser. The product is always "1" because the individuals are focused on themselves, never trusting the other not to obliterate them if given the chance.
Having been at both tables, I can tell you that who is to blame for women sitting in their masculine energy is irrelevant and it's just a waste of energy to go back and forth about it. The important thing to note is that most women don't WANT to sit in it and would naturally soften for a man that provides true safety and leadership. It happens so naturally that the woman won't even realize she's doing it, she just will. If the woman by your side has not made that shift, it's likely because you have not shown yourself to be safe or you haven't built the trust necessary for her to be confident in your leadership. Now I said "likely" because some women just can't get out of their own way, be it past relationship experiences or other personal trauma that left them with major trust issues. Bar that particular situation, it's you, bruh, because again, it's not something a woman has to even think about. She doesn't decide to become softer, she just does. It's home to [most of] us and after all, isn't that all any of us ever really want, to go home? But many of us haven't been for a long, long time because in this current dating and relationship climate, we simply can't afford the trip.....
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