RIP to former Temptations lead singer, Ali Woodson, who died Sunday of cancer. He was 58.
Monday, May 31, 2010
And Ali Makes Three
RIP to former Temptations lead singer, Ali Woodson, who died Sunday of cancer. He was 58.
Sunday, May 30, 2010
Chaos
Have you ever stopped to think about the people you’ve stopped talking to and wonder how you would react if something bad happened to them? I’ve had occasion for this to cross my mind before, but when it came about today, it was because something bad had already happened. Nobody died, but they could have, and the magnitude of their transgression against me is such that I had, for a long time, thought unforgivable. I still struggle with total absolution, but the near-hatred has dissipated, and the event that was brought to my attention put me in a mental space more cloudy and chaotic than I have occupied in quite a while.
Do I feel an obligation to make a move? No. However I do feel an opportunity to have some questions answered is upon me and as time ticks away, the portal to those answers slowly narrows. Do I really need to know? Do I really want to know? I still cant say. But cycles are called cycles for a reason and they can only be broken by someone, somewhere, taking a step forward in a direction opposite of which inclined. Pride aside, it might be time. I don’t feel ready, but... it might be time.
Do I feel an obligation to make a move? No. However I do feel an opportunity to have some questions answered is upon me and as time ticks away, the portal to those answers slowly narrows. Do I really need to know? Do I really want to know? I still cant say. But cycles are called cycles for a reason and they can only be broken by someone, somewhere, taking a step forward in a direction opposite of which inclined. Pride aside, it might be time. I don’t feel ready, but... it might be time.
Saturday, May 29, 2010
Saturday, May 22, 2010
Change
Good or bad, nothing lasts forever. The only constant in life is change. You can fight against it and live the sensation of swimming upstream for the rest of your life, or you can embrace it, realize that there is a season for everything - both struggle and joy - and let the lessons you learn along the way make you a better person.
People should realize also that change is not just something that happens to you. Change is also something that, from time to time, needs to be imposed. It's not always a matter of doing something different - sometimes its a matter of decision-making, and that sometimes means making decisions that might make someone else unhappy. A great example of that is relationships. You have the right to not be with someone who isnt what you want or need, even if they still believe in it. Now that doesnt sound like change, does it? Well, it is, in some respect. Its a means of taking control of your destiny and not allowing something to become a burdensome and fruitless obligation. Sometimes you have to say no.
"Yes" will free you too. Giving yourself permission to be happy is essential to actually being happy. Open yourself up to change. Ever heard the phrase "dont knock it til you've tried it?" This is very abstract, but I think this is why I have a hard time believing a person can really know what they want until they get it (I'll save that for another blog LOL). Whatever you feel is missing from your life is not just going to fall out of the sky. You have to go out there and get it. Im big on prayer, yall, but God helps those who help themselves. You cant ask Him to order your steps if you arent taking any.
So embrace change when it comes and effect change where you can. Its an unavoidable part of life, so to resist it will only serve to make you miserable. Learn to enjoy the good things while they last, and when they begin to fade, brace yourself for the rough times ahead and know that they too will come to an end when your turn comes back around. To every action there is an equal an opposite reaction, yin and yang, the balance of the universe, and all that jazz. It really is the way the world turns.
People should realize also that change is not just something that happens to you. Change is also something that, from time to time, needs to be imposed. It's not always a matter of doing something different - sometimes its a matter of decision-making, and that sometimes means making decisions that might make someone else unhappy. A great example of that is relationships. You have the right to not be with someone who isnt what you want or need, even if they still believe in it. Now that doesnt sound like change, does it? Well, it is, in some respect. Its a means of taking control of your destiny and not allowing something to become a burdensome and fruitless obligation. Sometimes you have to say no.
"Yes" will free you too. Giving yourself permission to be happy is essential to actually being happy. Open yourself up to change. Ever heard the phrase "dont knock it til you've tried it?" This is very abstract, but I think this is why I have a hard time believing a person can really know what they want until they get it (I'll save that for another blog LOL). Whatever you feel is missing from your life is not just going to fall out of the sky. You have to go out there and get it. Im big on prayer, yall, but God helps those who help themselves. You cant ask Him to order your steps if you arent taking any.
So embrace change when it comes and effect change where you can. Its an unavoidable part of life, so to resist it will only serve to make you miserable. Learn to enjoy the good things while they last, and when they begin to fade, brace yourself for the rough times ahead and know that they too will come to an end when your turn comes back around. To every action there is an equal an opposite reaction, yin and yang, the balance of the universe, and all that jazz. It really is the way the world turns.
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
Bamboozled and Hoodwinked!
So I went to see a psychic yesterday..... well actually, Im a lazy bitch who didn’t quite finish writing this the same day I started it, so it was actually two days ago now, but I digress LOL.
Let me start by saying that I have a lot of respect for the spirit world, as well as the power of the human mind, and I find astrology in general – mostly as it relates to the zodiac – very interesting. However, I have a little bit of an issue with “psychics for hire.” As [what some would call] a “dreamer” myself (meaning that I’ve been known to have premonition dreams, or say things with no conscious reason to, and it will happen), I have a hard time subscribing to the type of vibing that entails me sitting opposite you, with my money on the table LOL. Telekinesis aside (although Im not so sure about that one either LOL) I generally think visions just kind of come to you. These “feelings” you get just kinda come to you. The idea that someone can sit at a table and read ANYBODY who comes in just does not fly well with me. What’s interesting is that I don’t know if I felt like that before I went to this lady. Maybe I never even really thought about it, or maybe this lady just didn’t convince me that SHE had the ability to do it, but either way, Im a little tight about my bread right about now LOL.
So let me tell yall about it.
I had no desire to see anybody’s fortune teller, but then a friend of mine went and was totally blown away by her reading, suggesting that I go as well. Let her tell it, the lady was really on point and gave her a lot to think about regarding her future. Not long after, another friend of mine went to this lady. She was a lot less blown away, but she did credit her for being accurate about some things from her past. She suggested I go just for the hell of it too, but by that time, my first friend had already started flipping out about some of the stuff she was told LOL. She would check herself, saying she don’t need to go back for no more information because she should not have gone in the first place, but then she’d end up right back at the lady’s house. Obsessing about ANYTHING right now is the last thing I need in my life, so I wasn’t sure I was gonna go, even after I already said I would, but in the end, I had faith in my ability to take it for what it was and view it as being for entertainment purposes only. This was not going to be a blueprint for my life and this woman was not going to be a replacement for the God that I know and love and trust in.
Well at the last minute, I decide I want to go alone. I figure if its about reading my energy, I want her to actually be reading MY energy and not having it clouded by the energy of whoever else is present. I also wasn’t sure I wanted Pandora’s box to be opened and spewed all across nobody’s laps LOL. I mean, my circle is, for the most part, a no judgment zone, but if I have chosen to keep certain pieces of my life personal, I don’t want Lady Lena just up and deciding otherwise.
So I get to the lady’s house and the décor is kinda cheesy and velveteen, almost like you’d expect from what you’ve seen on TV – but cheaper LOL. There’s no incense burning, no crystal ball on the table, no cat in the window – just a chatty little Native American woman in sweatpants and a t-shirt. Didn’t really expect her to look like a gypsy, so that was okay. She thought she was slick though. She called herself being sociable while she was getting her cards together, but she was really getting base information to work with. All in all, in that 2 or 3 minutes, I told her the names, ages and genders of my kids, a little about their father, my age and zodiac sign (both of which shocked her) and where I work. She dug a little more while I shuffled the deck and I ended up telling her another few things, which were resurrected later in the reading, but long story short, I found her skills to be a little suspect.
First of all, I dig astrology. In my mind, being “open” with no wall up, no skepticism going in, should have made me easy to read. Second of all, there has been a LOT going on with me in just the past six months that she should have been able to pick up on and she didn’t pick up on ANY of it. I mean, JUST before I went there, pseudo-sig pissed me CLEAN off. There was absolutely no mention of him AT ALL, nor any of the other guys that have recently traipsed through my life. The struggle to stop smoking, health issues, the job, the recurring dreams, the emergence of my father, the emergence of my mother’s ex-husband – there are a whole slew of relevant things that she didn’t even touch on. There might have been two things that I didn’t mention to her that she touched on slightly, but she didn’t delve into them. She seemed to have zero insight.
I didn’t get the feeling that she was reading me at all. It seemed to me that she was applying common sense and societal norms to whatever set of circumstances were on the table. For instance, if you have a history with your ex that depicts him as a bastard, people would probably expect that you don’t get along now, and interaction you have with him is forced. If you’re a woman living in a certain city in upstate New York, people would probably expect that you have a lingering hatred for the men there LOL. Common sense and societal norms LOL. There was nothing “psychic” about it, in my opinion, and she was WAY off on most of what she said, for that reason. I came to the conclusion that most times, she would say things that are pretty general and the customer would just insert people who might fit into the vague places themselves, MAKING the “reading” seem accurate, when its really just some bullshit. Im paying you to tell me who these people are, I don’t wanna connect the dots. But what did she say about me? Well…..
She said I would relocate in a year and a half to two year’s time and that the man I would eventually marry is down there, where I want to move – not too light, not too dark, I’d meet him through a friend or family member, and that will be in the next 2-3 months. (Riiiiight) In the between time, there will be two other guys locally, neither of which would be worth my time, and I know them already. One has relationship issues from a current or past one, and the other is just a douche. (I think she googled me and read my blog LOL. That’s only every man I’ve ever met in my life LOL.) She sees prosperity around me (probably had nothing to do with the $100 bill I laid on the table LOL) She painted a picture of hatred for my kids father (oh…. Then maybe he’s not really one of my best friends and its all in my mind LOL) and she says my mom has been trying to apologize for our past (#FAIL - I should forward her my email inbox. But I gave her half a point on that one, because she could have been sensing my father was trying to do that and just pegged the wrong parent). Several times, she flip-flopped. She saw a baby, then she didn’t see one, then she said I’d have one if I wanted to and wouldn’t if I didn’t. (Well there ya go LOL). No mention of a pending trip – which there is – and when I did ask questions about what she said, she never really answered them. In short, she didn’t tell me anything that I felt justified my $80 and it damn sure wasn’t an hour’s worth of shit. She kept telling me the same shit over and over again. I guess “for entertainment purposes only” didn’t even apply in this case, because I didn’t even find it entertaining. But oh well. I waste $80 on bullshit all the time. At least this time was something different.
I cant say I’d never go to another reader, but I can definitely tell you that I wont be going to see that one again. I’d be better off with some bazooka joe wrappers and a magic 8 ball.
Let me start by saying that I have a lot of respect for the spirit world, as well as the power of the human mind, and I find astrology in general – mostly as it relates to the zodiac – very interesting. However, I have a little bit of an issue with “psychics for hire.” As [what some would call] a “dreamer” myself (meaning that I’ve been known to have premonition dreams, or say things with no conscious reason to, and it will happen), I have a hard time subscribing to the type of vibing that entails me sitting opposite you, with my money on the table LOL. Telekinesis aside (although Im not so sure about that one either LOL) I generally think visions just kind of come to you. These “feelings” you get just kinda come to you. The idea that someone can sit at a table and read ANYBODY who comes in just does not fly well with me. What’s interesting is that I don’t know if I felt like that before I went to this lady. Maybe I never even really thought about it, or maybe this lady just didn’t convince me that SHE had the ability to do it, but either way, Im a little tight about my bread right about now LOL.
So let me tell yall about it.
I had no desire to see anybody’s fortune teller, but then a friend of mine went and was totally blown away by her reading, suggesting that I go as well. Let her tell it, the lady was really on point and gave her a lot to think about regarding her future. Not long after, another friend of mine went to this lady. She was a lot less blown away, but she did credit her for being accurate about some things from her past. She suggested I go just for the hell of it too, but by that time, my first friend had already started flipping out about some of the stuff she was told LOL. She would check herself, saying she don’t need to go back for no more information because she should not have gone in the first place, but then she’d end up right back at the lady’s house. Obsessing about ANYTHING right now is the last thing I need in my life, so I wasn’t sure I was gonna go, even after I already said I would, but in the end, I had faith in my ability to take it for what it was and view it as being for entertainment purposes only. This was not going to be a blueprint for my life and this woman was not going to be a replacement for the God that I know and love and trust in.
Well at the last minute, I decide I want to go alone. I figure if its about reading my energy, I want her to actually be reading MY energy and not having it clouded by the energy of whoever else is present. I also wasn’t sure I wanted Pandora’s box to be opened and spewed all across nobody’s laps LOL. I mean, my circle is, for the most part, a no judgment zone, but if I have chosen to keep certain pieces of my life personal, I don’t want Lady Lena just up and deciding otherwise.
So I get to the lady’s house and the décor is kinda cheesy and velveteen, almost like you’d expect from what you’ve seen on TV – but cheaper LOL. There’s no incense burning, no crystal ball on the table, no cat in the window – just a chatty little Native American woman in sweatpants and a t-shirt. Didn’t really expect her to look like a gypsy, so that was okay. She thought she was slick though. She called herself being sociable while she was getting her cards together, but she was really getting base information to work with. All in all, in that 2 or 3 minutes, I told her the names, ages and genders of my kids, a little about their father, my age and zodiac sign (both of which shocked her) and where I work. She dug a little more while I shuffled the deck and I ended up telling her another few things, which were resurrected later in the reading, but long story short, I found her skills to be a little suspect.
First of all, I dig astrology. In my mind, being “open” with no wall up, no skepticism going in, should have made me easy to read. Second of all, there has been a LOT going on with me in just the past six months that she should have been able to pick up on and she didn’t pick up on ANY of it. I mean, JUST before I went there, pseudo-sig pissed me CLEAN off. There was absolutely no mention of him AT ALL, nor any of the other guys that have recently traipsed through my life. The struggle to stop smoking, health issues, the job, the recurring dreams, the emergence of my father, the emergence of my mother’s ex-husband – there are a whole slew of relevant things that she didn’t even touch on. There might have been two things that I didn’t mention to her that she touched on slightly, but she didn’t delve into them. She seemed to have zero insight.
I didn’t get the feeling that she was reading me at all. It seemed to me that she was applying common sense and societal norms to whatever set of circumstances were on the table. For instance, if you have a history with your ex that depicts him as a bastard, people would probably expect that you don’t get along now, and interaction you have with him is forced. If you’re a woman living in a certain city in upstate New York, people would probably expect that you have a lingering hatred for the men there LOL. Common sense and societal norms LOL. There was nothing “psychic” about it, in my opinion, and she was WAY off on most of what she said, for that reason. I came to the conclusion that most times, she would say things that are pretty general and the customer would just insert people who might fit into the vague places themselves, MAKING the “reading” seem accurate, when its really just some bullshit. Im paying you to tell me who these people are, I don’t wanna connect the dots. But what did she say about me? Well…..
She said I would relocate in a year and a half to two year’s time and that the man I would eventually marry is down there, where I want to move – not too light, not too dark, I’d meet him through a friend or family member, and that will be in the next 2-3 months. (Riiiiight) In the between time, there will be two other guys locally, neither of which would be worth my time, and I know them already. One has relationship issues from a current or past one, and the other is just a douche. (I think she googled me and read my blog LOL. That’s only every man I’ve ever met in my life LOL.) She sees prosperity around me (probably had nothing to do with the $100 bill I laid on the table LOL) She painted a picture of hatred for my kids father (oh…. Then maybe he’s not really one of my best friends and its all in my mind LOL) and she says my mom has been trying to apologize for our past (#FAIL - I should forward her my email inbox. But I gave her half a point on that one, because she could have been sensing my father was trying to do that and just pegged the wrong parent). Several times, she flip-flopped. She saw a baby, then she didn’t see one, then she said I’d have one if I wanted to and wouldn’t if I didn’t. (Well there ya go LOL). No mention of a pending trip – which there is – and when I did ask questions about what she said, she never really answered them. In short, she didn’t tell me anything that I felt justified my $80 and it damn sure wasn’t an hour’s worth of shit. She kept telling me the same shit over and over again. I guess “for entertainment purposes only” didn’t even apply in this case, because I didn’t even find it entertaining. But oh well. I waste $80 on bullshit all the time. At least this time was something different.
I cant say I’d never go to another reader, but I can definitely tell you that I wont be going to see that one again. I’d be better off with some bazooka joe wrappers and a magic 8 ball.
Saturday, May 15, 2010
Jesus Be a Shot of Patron
Im gettin that feeling again. These dudes are driving me fucken crazy.
There are seven days in a week. I remove one for personal use, leaving six for yours. You take advantage of only two of them - no explanation, but none needed. I aint trippin. I assume you are off doing a few of the things I anticipated you to be doing while you're in town - I never intended to monopolize your time.
Now on day seven, you decide to throw a tantrum, somehow blaming ME for you not making use of the time set out for you. Im not quite sure how that works. You dont like the way I've been acting, but when asked how I've been acting, you rather talk about it in person - yet you still didnt make your way to me. Instead, you're on your way to some place an hour away from here, but I'd have bet anything, it would still be my fault when you got back.
You got back, came over, and all of a sudden you dont feel like you felt when you were menstruating all over my cell phone, and Im not supposed to inquire about what you said. You pretend its all good, saying youre still lobbying for "us" but that all changes when I make it clear that I expect for you to go home. Wait.... you REALLY thought you were spending the night? REALLY? Wow. What color is the sky in your world?
I am sick to death of these fools right about now LOL. Im so glad I have a sense of humor and can just laugh about these incidents, but I gotta tell ya - Im about ready to slap somebody.
There are seven days in a week. I remove one for personal use, leaving six for yours. You take advantage of only two of them - no explanation, but none needed. I aint trippin. I assume you are off doing a few of the things I anticipated you to be doing while you're in town - I never intended to monopolize your time.
Now on day seven, you decide to throw a tantrum, somehow blaming ME for you not making use of the time set out for you. Im not quite sure how that works. You dont like the way I've been acting, but when asked how I've been acting, you rather talk about it in person - yet you still didnt make your way to me. Instead, you're on your way to some place an hour away from here, but I'd have bet anything, it would still be my fault when you got back.
You got back, came over, and all of a sudden you dont feel like you felt when you were menstruating all over my cell phone, and Im not supposed to inquire about what you said. You pretend its all good, saying youre still lobbying for "us" but that all changes when I make it clear that I expect for you to go home. Wait.... you REALLY thought you were spending the night? REALLY? Wow. What color is the sky in your world?
I am sick to death of these fools right about now LOL. Im so glad I have a sense of humor and can just laugh about these incidents, but I gotta tell ya - Im about ready to slap somebody.
Friday, May 14, 2010
iCant
One of the most annoying things in the world to me is a person that insists on stating the obvious. IDK if its because they think they are so smart by doing so, or if they think Im so dumb that I didnt know what was going on before they decided to speak on it, but either way, I cant stand that shit.
I also cant stand when a dude is so insecure that every time I open my mouth, no matter what it is that I said, his response is, "what's that supposed to mean?" Um.... I said Im hungry. It means I havent eaten."
*staring into the camera*
I had to cut off a suitor recently because he was too fucken emotional, and I really feel like Im gonna be cuttin off Mr. Pseudo-Sig for the same reason. I need people to understand that not everything I do is about you. Sometimes I do shit simply because I just feel like doing it. Mind-boggling, huh?
Aside from the obvious irritation that results from the above, I just really feel like I know when what you bring to the table is not gonna feed the family, you know what I mean? Myself, I need an intellectual guy. Not smart - intellectual. You can be smart and not have it be visible until you are forced into a situation. I need a brother that I dont have to "dumb it down" for.
Case in point: my FB status this morning. "Woke up early with a lot on my mind. My daughter comes down while Im drinking my coffee, looking out the window, and says, 'Mommy, its raining now, but its gonna be sunny later.' Kids always seem to know... :)" Pseudo's response: "I cant wait for it to be sunny in the Roc."
*staring into the camera*
You do know that was deeper than the weather, right? But I didnt call him an idiot in front of all his friends, I replied with a mere "Word," and kept it moving. Later on in the morning, I sent him a text about the park, which he's been talking about since before he even came to town and his response was some bullshit about not liking the way I have been acting. O....k..... and how is that? "We'll talk in person." LOL Really? Ok, lets do that. Make it easy for me.
Because honestly, Ive been going back and forth in my mind for a few weeks now about where, if anywhere, this thing is going, and I have come to the conclusion that he would not fare well with a woman like me. I am, in no way, trying to toot my own horn, but I am fully aware of my powers and try to use them only for good LOL. Were I tempted to do so, I could destroy him LOL. But in the end, that will just end up being more work for me, and I like things simple. So I have known for a couple of weeks that this thing was not going to progress too much further but was just waiting for the timing to present itself. Looks like it has, and Im about to proceed, guilt-free on these fools.
Sidebar: the barber came by yesterday to sell me a purse (you know they got 800 hustles LOL). He knows where I live now, so this is going to be an interesting summer LOL
I also cant stand when a dude is so insecure that every time I open my mouth, no matter what it is that I said, his response is, "what's that supposed to mean?" Um.... I said Im hungry. It means I havent eaten."
*staring into the camera*
I had to cut off a suitor recently because he was too fucken emotional, and I really feel like Im gonna be cuttin off Mr. Pseudo-Sig for the same reason. I need people to understand that not everything I do is about you. Sometimes I do shit simply because I just feel like doing it. Mind-boggling, huh?
Aside from the obvious irritation that results from the above, I just really feel like I know when what you bring to the table is not gonna feed the family, you know what I mean? Myself, I need an intellectual guy. Not smart - intellectual. You can be smart and not have it be visible until you are forced into a situation. I need a brother that I dont have to "dumb it down" for.
Case in point: my FB status this morning. "Woke up early with a lot on my mind. My daughter comes down while Im drinking my coffee, looking out the window, and says, 'Mommy, its raining now, but its gonna be sunny later.' Kids always seem to know... :)" Pseudo's response: "I cant wait for it to be sunny in the Roc."
*staring into the camera*
You do know that was deeper than the weather, right? But I didnt call him an idiot in front of all his friends, I replied with a mere "Word," and kept it moving. Later on in the morning, I sent him a text about the park, which he's been talking about since before he even came to town and his response was some bullshit about not liking the way I have been acting. O....k..... and how is that? "We'll talk in person." LOL Really? Ok, lets do that. Make it easy for me.
Because honestly, Ive been going back and forth in my mind for a few weeks now about where, if anywhere, this thing is going, and I have come to the conclusion that he would not fare well with a woman like me. I am, in no way, trying to toot my own horn, but I am fully aware of my powers and try to use them only for good LOL. Were I tempted to do so, I could destroy him LOL. But in the end, that will just end up being more work for me, and I like things simple. So I have known for a couple of weeks that this thing was not going to progress too much further but was just waiting for the timing to present itself. Looks like it has, and Im about to proceed, guilt-free on these fools.
Sidebar: the barber came by yesterday to sell me a purse (you know they got 800 hustles LOL). He knows where I live now, so this is going to be an interesting summer LOL
Thursday, May 13, 2010
Oh Happy Day
My house is a mess.
My gas tank is on E. In fact, if there was anything after E, it would be on that. Maybe they should add E- to the gauge LOL
I havent had a pedicure in so long, my feet arent speaking to me, my cuticles are on strike and my eyebrows broke up with me about two weeks ago LOL.
Still and all, I woke up feeling glorious and all of the above will be taken care of as soon as the mailman shows up.
The sun is shining - even if it is only 46 degrees at the moment - I dont have to go back to work until Monday, and Folgers instant coffee, with a little french vanilla creamer, is still the best thing since sliced bread.
Ahh, the simple things..... enjoy your day, folks.
My gas tank is on E. In fact, if there was anything after E, it would be on that. Maybe they should add E- to the gauge LOL
I havent had a pedicure in so long, my feet arent speaking to me, my cuticles are on strike and my eyebrows broke up with me about two weeks ago LOL.
Still and all, I woke up feeling glorious and all of the above will be taken care of as soon as the mailman shows up.
The sun is shining - even if it is only 46 degrees at the moment - I dont have to go back to work until Monday, and Folgers instant coffee, with a little french vanilla creamer, is still the best thing since sliced bread.
Ahh, the simple things..... enjoy your day, folks.
Monday, May 10, 2010
RIP Lena Horne
Ground-breaking actress, singer and stage performer, Lena Horne has died, at the age of 92.
and in related news:
Alicia Keys will play Lena Horne in a movie on the music legend and not Janet Jackson as was rumored earlier.
Talk show host Oprah Winfrey, who has taken over the project, wanted Keys in the lead role, pagesix.com reports. She said: ‘We are going to start filming next year. And we have got Alicia.’
The casting seems to be making sense since Keys and Horne share a lot in common. Both were from New York and became famous quickly. Keys is a spokesperson for several AIDS organizations and Horne was heavily involved in the civil rights movement.
Horne [had been] deeply involved in the casting process and had asked Jackson to remove herself from the project after the Super Bowl controversy where the pop star exposed her breast during a performance and claimed it was wardrobe malfunction.
Source: EarthTimes.Org
Sunday, May 9, 2010
Happy Mother's Day....
... to all the moms AND dads out there. Those of us knee-deep in the trenches know how often those roles overlap.
Woke up, went to church, and it had the nerve to be snowing when I got out. *smh* My baby had breakfast waiting for me when I got home [read: she microwaved some french toast sticks LOL] so I ate that, opened my gifts (awwww) and then made some fish and grits. She's only eight, her options were limited, but "Let Mommy show you how its done." LOL
Spent the rest of the day doing absolutely nothing except watching season one of Lost. Gotta know what the hype is about. That being said, two more episodes left. Yall enjoy your night. I'll holla.
Woke up, went to church, and it had the nerve to be snowing when I got out. *smh* My baby had breakfast waiting for me when I got home [read: she microwaved some french toast sticks LOL] so I ate that, opened my gifts (awwww) and then made some fish and grits. She's only eight, her options were limited, but "Let Mommy show you how its done." LOL
Spent the rest of the day doing absolutely nothing except watching season one of Lost. Gotta know what the hype is about. That being said, two more episodes left. Yall enjoy your night. I'll holla.
Saturday, May 8, 2010
Doctor's Orders: Cheating
Oooh, yall quick! But LOL @ the basic nature of the question LMAO! Yall goin easy on me for the first couple times huh? LOL All good, I can dig it. Lets get into it...
Dear Doc,
Im pretty sure my friend's boyfriend is cheating on her, but I dont know if I should tell her. What do you think?
-IDK
Dear IDK,
This is a tough one for me to answer because there are so many factors to each situation that might change my position. You didnt really give any specifics, so here's my general response: if you are going to tell her, you better have irrefutable proof. Not just for her benefit, but for yours. Its important that you, yourself, are sure because the guy is likely to deny it. Hopefully your friendship is strong enough that she wont question your motives and realizes you are only looking out for her.
Dig
That being said, I feel like I need to qualify my answer LOL. Generally speaking, I believe that things done in the dark, always come to the light - eventually. In most cases - especially if you cant prove the allegation - I think it best to not say anything and just let (or help LOL) the friend find out for themselves. But if you just feel compelled to dish, there are a few things you need to consider:
1. Are you relatively confident that your friend would leave her cheating man? If you dont think she will, stay out of it. Its just a whole heap of headache, waiting to happen.
2. What do you mean when you say "cheating?" Is he just an all out manwhore, pushing up on every Sue, Pam and Sally who'll let him, or is he seeing another woman in particular? It matters because if he's a manwhore, she probably already knows, or at least suspects, and telling her wont change anything.
3. Are you good friends? Dont meddle in the business of simple associates. You have no skin in the game and drama is bound to ensue. A good friend will likely not only believe you, but not allow the guy to drive a wedge between you.
4. Does he know you know? This is one of the only scenarios where I say tell her and tell her FAST. If you allow him time to think up an explanation, or worse yet, a way to turn it around on you, all hell is going to break loose. The best situation to be up against is one where the two of you are racing to her front door, trying to get to her first. He'll always look like an idiot LOL.
5. Its important that you be willing to accept the results (or lack thereof) of your revelation. Once you break the news (and hopefully gently LOL) back off. Allow her to react and dont try to drive her decision with your own feelings about the situation. If your girl decides to stay, you have to be willing to swallow that because it is her life and you cant want more for somebody than they want for themselves. You will have to let it go. Continuing to harp on it will only strain your friendship.
I think its important that you know your friends. Dont yall have girls nights? Dont yall.... TALK? LOL Has this conversation never come up before? ASK your friends if they would want to know. Surprisingly enough, not everyone does. Do you?
Note to MY friends: Fuck that. Tell me.
Dear Doc,
Im pretty sure my friend's boyfriend is cheating on her, but I dont know if I should tell her. What do you think?
-IDK
Dear IDK,
This is a tough one for me to answer because there are so many factors to each situation that might change my position. You didnt really give any specifics, so here's my general response: if you are going to tell her, you better have irrefutable proof. Not just for her benefit, but for yours. Its important that you, yourself, are sure because the guy is likely to deny it. Hopefully your friendship is strong enough that she wont question your motives and realizes you are only looking out for her.
Dig
That being said, I feel like I need to qualify my answer LOL. Generally speaking, I believe that things done in the dark, always come to the light - eventually. In most cases - especially if you cant prove the allegation - I think it best to not say anything and just let (or help LOL) the friend find out for themselves. But if you just feel compelled to dish, there are a few things you need to consider:
1. Are you relatively confident that your friend would leave her cheating man? If you dont think she will, stay out of it. Its just a whole heap of headache, waiting to happen.
2. What do you mean when you say "cheating?" Is he just an all out manwhore, pushing up on every Sue, Pam and Sally who'll let him, or is he seeing another woman in particular? It matters because if he's a manwhore, she probably already knows, or at least suspects, and telling her wont change anything.
3. Are you good friends? Dont meddle in the business of simple associates. You have no skin in the game and drama is bound to ensue. A good friend will likely not only believe you, but not allow the guy to drive a wedge between you.
4. Does he know you know? This is one of the only scenarios where I say tell her and tell her FAST. If you allow him time to think up an explanation, or worse yet, a way to turn it around on you, all hell is going to break loose. The best situation to be up against is one where the two of you are racing to her front door, trying to get to her first. He'll always look like an idiot LOL.
5. Its important that you be willing to accept the results (or lack thereof) of your revelation. Once you break the news (and hopefully gently LOL) back off. Allow her to react and dont try to drive her decision with your own feelings about the situation. If your girl decides to stay, you have to be willing to swallow that because it is her life and you cant want more for somebody than they want for themselves. You will have to let it go. Continuing to harp on it will only strain your friendship.
I think its important that you know your friends. Dont yall have girls nights? Dont yall.... TALK? LOL Has this conversation never come up before? ASK your friends if they would want to know. Surprisingly enough, not everyone does. Do you?
Note to MY friends: Fuck that. Tell me.
Friday, May 7, 2010
So Sensitive
Oooooooh! I cant STAND no sensitive ass dude! I swear I cant.
WTF is wrong with you? You are not my man. We aint even dating. We have only even been in communication for like a week and some change, but all that is besides the point.
If you’re suggesting we hang out tonight, am I not entitled to ask you to either commit to that plan or risk me having other plans? You can keep your “maybe” a maybe. Im not forcing you in one direction or another. Im simply saying that if it’s a “maybe” for you, its also a “maybe” for me and you might call me later and find that I have chosen to do something else with somebody who was SURE they wanted to spend that time with me and didn’t need a few hours to think about it LOL. No tea, no shade, just the risk you run when you are arrogant enough to believe some chick sits at home, twiddling her thumbs, waiting for her phone to ring with your name on the display. FUCK YOU. How bout that? LOL
This dude had the nerve to say "well last Friday you said just call and it was cool, so why you in such a rush to get a decision today?"
*staring into the camera*
Because that was LAST Friday. Just because I was home doing nothing last week dont mean Ima be home doing nothing this week and Im TELLING you right now that I have other options, and giving you the opportunity to get first dibs, so if you forfeit that, its on you. Dude caught feelings cause his head automatically went to me making plans with another dude. Well.... that isnt necessarily gonna be the case, however that is a possibility. But WTF do you care? My girls, some dude - either way, if I got other plans, they aint gon be with you LOL. He pouted like a little bitch. Arrogant ass dudes that pout are the worst. What did you think would happen? Was I supposed to sit home and wait for you to make up your mind and be mad when you didnt call? Not in this lifetime. I only do shit like that when I really dont care one way or the other if I stay home and do nothing - a la last Friday. When I already know thats not the case, you might just become a casualty of my dance card.
See.... LOL This is exactly why.... *smh*
*sigh*
WTF is wrong with you? You are not my man. We aint even dating. We have only even been in communication for like a week and some change, but all that is besides the point.
If you’re suggesting we hang out tonight, am I not entitled to ask you to either commit to that plan or risk me having other plans? You can keep your “maybe” a maybe. Im not forcing you in one direction or another. Im simply saying that if it’s a “maybe” for you, its also a “maybe” for me and you might call me later and find that I have chosen to do something else with somebody who was SURE they wanted to spend that time with me and didn’t need a few hours to think about it LOL. No tea, no shade, just the risk you run when you are arrogant enough to believe some chick sits at home, twiddling her thumbs, waiting for her phone to ring with your name on the display. FUCK YOU. How bout that? LOL
This dude had the nerve to say "well last Friday you said just call and it was cool, so why you in such a rush to get a decision today?"
*staring into the camera*
Because that was LAST Friday. Just because I was home doing nothing last week dont mean Ima be home doing nothing this week and Im TELLING you right now that I have other options, and giving you the opportunity to get first dibs, so if you forfeit that, its on you. Dude caught feelings cause his head automatically went to me making plans with another dude. Well.... that isnt necessarily gonna be the case, however that is a possibility. But WTF do you care? My girls, some dude - either way, if I got other plans, they aint gon be with you LOL. He pouted like a little bitch. Arrogant ass dudes that pout are the worst. What did you think would happen? Was I supposed to sit home and wait for you to make up your mind and be mad when you didnt call? Not in this lifetime. I only do shit like that when I really dont care one way or the other if I stay home and do nothing - a la last Friday. When I already know thats not the case, you might just become a casualty of my dance card.
See.... LOL This is exactly why.... *smh*
*sigh*
Shine On: Chevy
LMAO! So this is something my homey "Chevy G Hustle" wrote like three or four years ago for our old "watering hole". Me (affectionately referred to as "Number 9" around the way LOL) and the cronies were laughing, reminiscing about it today, so (after obtaining clearance, of course LOL) I decided to share. Whether you agree or disagree, the shit is still hysterical LOL.
****************************************
After some hard work and technical EXCELLENCE on my part...here we go
*please let this be the one LOL*
There Are 10 Types of Women
I was sitting up last night....nah I take that back. I was playing 'golf' on the green last night and tried to break the type of women there are. And besides, my lil cousin just lost his virginity last night. So now he's been corrupted and he's gonna want to fuck different broads all the time. So I wrote him a 'pamplet' describing the advantages and disadvantages of these 10 different types of women.
Help me out with some more types and advantages/disadvantages of fucking with these women.
10 WOMEN WE ALL KNOW (And don't act like you don't)
1. GOLD DIGGER
Advantages
A. Always fine as hell
B. Will give up the booty when you're spending cash
C. Get on her good side and she'll use other dudes money to buy stuff for you
Disadvantages
A. Will ONLY give up the booty when you're spending cash
B. Has a million male friends in the "league"
C. Will dump your ass for the nigga in the 07 S550
2. CHICKENHEAD aka DIRTY-FOOT aka HOODRAT
Advantages
A. Down for "what-ever" (will let you get her on tape)
B. Booty-call material
C. Has your back in most situations and will bust-a-cap if needed
Disadvantages
A. Will bust a cap in YO ass, if need be
B. Ghetto as hell
C. Comes with MAD drama
3. MS "MY CLOCK IS TICKING"
Advantages
A. Will give up the booty as long as you seem ready for a relationship
B. Will go above and beyond the duty to please you (sex, food, money)
Disadvantages
A. Wants to be married yesterday
B. Wants to be a mother yesterday
C. Her whole family has pegged you as the one
4. THE VIRGIN
Advantages
A. NOBODY has ever tapped that ass
B. Now shes all yours
Disadvantages
A. You gotta teach her damn near everything
B. Insecure about the 300+ women you were with before her..
C. Gonna be really tight the first few times
D. Will never let you live it down if you try to leave after being the first
5. SPOILED BITCH
Advantages
A. Got a lot of shit already, cause she spoiled
B. Might not ask you for too much because daddy pays all her bills
C. Takes you out to eat, to the mall, and on trips
Disadvantages
A. Expects to get her way all the time (She's a Spoiled Bitch!)
B. Thinks that the Sun doesn't rise until she wakes up
C. Very insecure and unpredictable
D. Big ass crybaby
6. EX-GIRLFRIEND
Advantages
A. You can always hit it if you throw her a few lines that make it seem you two may be getting back together
B. Looks fine as hell when you want her
C. Somebody else's Girlfriend problem.
Disadvantages
A. Gets fat after you get her back
B. Insecure of other women
C. Your Girlfriend problem again
7. YOUR BABY MOMMA
Advantages
A. See advantages for ex-girlfriend
Disadvantages
A. See disadvantages for ex-girlfriend
B. She`s hitting you up for child support
8. SOMEONE ELSE`S BABY MOMMA
Advantages
A. Will give up the booty as long as you seem like a prospect to the job
B. Will do almost anything to get some help with her kid(s)
C. Already got enough drama going on. Nothing left for you but late booty calls and great sex when the kids sleep
Disadvantages
A. Her babies and their daddies
B. Might get pregnant for you too, thinking that you might stay if she
has your child
C. Her Baby Daddy better not catch you over there
9. MS. "FRIEND"
Advantages
A. Understands you
B. Easy to talk to
C. Gives you the inside track on what the hell women be thinking sometimes..
Disadvantages
A. Acts like she might give you the ass, but never does
B. Uses your advice to get the dude she really wants
C. Quits talking to you when her new boyfriend feels threatened
10. MS. "COOL AS HELL"
Advantages
A. Loves sports and video games
B. Loves hardcore rap music
C. Drinks and smokes blunts
D. Would do anything for you
Disadvantages
A. Likes women more than she likes men..
B. Could probably beat your ass
C. Isn't gonna give you any booty, but will call you a fag if you don't try
IN ORDER TO DEAL WITH ANY OF THE ABOVE WOMEN YOU WILL NEED ONE OF THESE.................
11. MS. "LUV YOUR DIRTY DRAWS" (shout out to the homie J. Rush for this one...he lurks on this site from time to time.)
Advantages
A. Knows you have a girlfriend
B. Still gives you the booty
C. Requires little to no attention
D. Will always be there for you no matter what
E. Is secretly in love with you, but knows if she asks you for a relationship, the answer is NO!
****************************************
After some hard work and technical EXCELLENCE on my part...here we go
*please let this be the one LOL*
There Are 10 Types of Women
I was sitting up last night....nah I take that back. I was playing 'golf' on the green last night and tried to break the type of women there are. And besides, my lil cousin just lost his virginity last night. So now he's been corrupted and he's gonna want to fuck different broads all the time. So I wrote him a 'pamplet' describing the advantages and disadvantages of these 10 different types of women.
Help me out with some more types and advantages/disadvantages of fucking with these women.
10 WOMEN WE ALL KNOW (And don't act like you don't)
1. GOLD DIGGER
Advantages
A. Always fine as hell
B. Will give up the booty when you're spending cash
C. Get on her good side and she'll use other dudes money to buy stuff for you
Disadvantages
A. Will ONLY give up the booty when you're spending cash
B. Has a million male friends in the "league"
C. Will dump your ass for the nigga in the 07 S550
2. CHICKENHEAD aka DIRTY-FOOT aka HOODRAT
Advantages
A. Down for "what-ever" (will let you get her on tape)
B. Booty-call material
C. Has your back in most situations and will bust-a-cap if needed
Disadvantages
A. Will bust a cap in YO ass, if need be
B. Ghetto as hell
C. Comes with MAD drama
3. MS "MY CLOCK IS TICKING"
Advantages
A. Will give up the booty as long as you seem ready for a relationship
B. Will go above and beyond the duty to please you (sex, food, money)
Disadvantages
A. Wants to be married yesterday
B. Wants to be a mother yesterday
C. Her whole family has pegged you as the one
4. THE VIRGIN
Advantages
A. NOBODY has ever tapped that ass
B. Now shes all yours
Disadvantages
A. You gotta teach her damn near everything
B. Insecure about the 300+ women you were with before her..
C. Gonna be really tight the first few times
D. Will never let you live it down if you try to leave after being the first
5. SPOILED BITCH
Advantages
A. Got a lot of shit already, cause she spoiled
B. Might not ask you for too much because daddy pays all her bills
C. Takes you out to eat, to the mall, and on trips
Disadvantages
A. Expects to get her way all the time (She's a Spoiled Bitch!)
B. Thinks that the Sun doesn't rise until she wakes up
C. Very insecure and unpredictable
D. Big ass crybaby
6. EX-GIRLFRIEND
Advantages
A. You can always hit it if you throw her a few lines that make it seem you two may be getting back together
B. Looks fine as hell when you want her
C. Somebody else's Girlfriend problem.
Disadvantages
A. Gets fat after you get her back
B. Insecure of other women
C. Your Girlfriend problem again
7. YOUR BABY MOMMA
Advantages
A. See advantages for ex-girlfriend
Disadvantages
A. See disadvantages for ex-girlfriend
B. She`s hitting you up for child support
8. SOMEONE ELSE`S BABY MOMMA
Advantages
A. Will give up the booty as long as you seem like a prospect to the job
B. Will do almost anything to get some help with her kid(s)
C. Already got enough drama going on. Nothing left for you but late booty calls and great sex when the kids sleep
Disadvantages
A. Her babies and their daddies
B. Might get pregnant for you too, thinking that you might stay if she
has your child
C. Her Baby Daddy better not catch you over there
9. MS. "FRIEND"
Advantages
A. Understands you
B. Easy to talk to
C. Gives you the inside track on what the hell women be thinking sometimes..
Disadvantages
A. Acts like she might give you the ass, but never does
B. Uses your advice to get the dude she really wants
C. Quits talking to you when her new boyfriend feels threatened
10. MS. "COOL AS HELL"
Advantages
A. Loves sports and video games
B. Loves hardcore rap music
C. Drinks and smokes blunts
D. Would do anything for you
Disadvantages
A. Likes women more than she likes men..
B. Could probably beat your ass
C. Isn't gonna give you any booty, but will call you a fag if you don't try
IN ORDER TO DEAL WITH ANY OF THE ABOVE WOMEN YOU WILL NEED ONE OF THESE.................
11. MS. "LUV YOUR DIRTY DRAWS" (shout out to the homie J. Rush for this one...he lurks on this site from time to time.)
Advantages
A. Knows you have a girlfriend
B. Still gives you the booty
C. Requires little to no attention
D. Will always be there for you no matter what
E. Is secretly in love with you, but knows if she asks you for a relationship, the answer is NO!
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
I Got an Email Today
My FB status:
"Ive always said 'if youre over 30 and cant get past some shit with somebody that happened way back when you were 17, you need to grow the fuck up.' Then I got an email from my father...."
#ineedadrink
My father aka the turkey baster.....[I wanna LOL here, but I find it difficult at the moment...] Far as Im concerned, thats all he ever did - help give me life. All accounts would indicate he's been AWOL since I was about 2yrs old. Never got the whole story on the incident that made my mama finally tell him to kick rocks, but I do know he kicked every last one of em and kept on kicking for the next eleven years. That's when his father died and his sister brought me around for the funeral, after having sought me out the year before to introduce me to the family I never knew. I met my grandfather once, he gave me twenty dollars, and then he died. Day of the funeral, turkey baster approaches me: "Do you know who I am?" I reply, "Yes." His clip is empty so he simply walks away. But I got an email today.
Funerals are uncomfortable enough without people whispering about you. They're even worse when the woman who was married to your father when he impregnated your mother doesnt even pretend not to hate you. If looks could kill, I'd be a ghostwriter for real. But whats this - an email?
At least he called sometimes after that. Not often or regularly, but sometimes - at least until I was about seventeen. Havent seen or heard from him since. But then I got this email today.
Fast forward five years later. My sister (his daughter) got sick with TB. I went to visit her in the hospital, having built a relationship with her since the first visits, but she didnt want me to see her in the way she was. It hurt, but I respected her wishes and left. A few hours later, just before flying back upstate, I sat in my aunt's kitchen while she spoke to the turkey baster on the phone, 3 feet away. She tried to get him to talk to me, mentioning my sadness at what had happened, but he wouldnt. You know what he said? "I dont wanna make her miss her flight." Oh..... thanks. How considerate of you. And today I get an email.
Adding insult to injury, my sister died a month later. I couldnt go to the funeral because the woman that was married to my father when he impregnated my mother wouldnt have it. With not even an attempt on his part to talk some sense into her - by all accounts - they put her in the ground without me. I had to make my own peace and none of it made any sense. Since then, not a phone call, not a letter, not a smoke signal, not a carrier pigeon, not a message passed, not anything. Then I get an email today.
My other sister from him and some of my cousins and I reunited via FB last year. Over the summer, I missed a family cookout being held an hour away from the hotel I was in that day in Manhattan. No word about it until the last minute, but honestly I probably wouldnt have gone anyway. Got home to find a picture sent to me by one of my cousins - my aunt, my uncle and the turkey baster. I looked at the picture and saw a lot of things, but my "father" wasnt one of them. But hey, Ive got mail!
A month or two ago, I reconnected with another cousin, who told me he now lives in Detroit, near her. "Wonderful," I say, not caring IF he lived, let alone WHERE. She said she talks to him all the time and had been trying to get him to reach out to me. For what? If he needs to be convinced, I'm not interested. She went to bat for him - he's afraid, he doesnt know what to say, and all the other things that were supposed to soften me up. I couldnt even pretend to care - like father like daughter. She told me she gave him my email address, which I can only assume was because a phone call might be too much like.... adult. So today, I got this email.
And you know, I started to think, in talking to her, maybe I ought to confront the issues if he's willing to man up about them. Maybe it will cause me to feel something - SOMETHING. Some resentment, some anger, SOMETHING. All these years, I havent. All these years, in my heart, he simply didnt exist. I opened up to the possibility of finally putting to rest all the things that brought me to this point with him - getting to ask the questions, even though I know I wont like most of the answers. But then I got this email. You know what it said?
"Havent heard from you in a while."
Havent heard from you in a while. Thats it. Open heart surgery, a car accident, a college graduation, a sister's death, two kids, and seventeen years, and thats all I got. I stared at the screen for a while, like more words were gonna appear any second. But thats all I got.
Thats all I got.
"Ive always said 'if youre over 30 and cant get past some shit with somebody that happened way back when you were 17, you need to grow the fuck up.' Then I got an email from my father...."
#ineedadrink
My father aka the turkey baster.....[I wanna LOL here, but I find it difficult at the moment...] Far as Im concerned, thats all he ever did - help give me life. All accounts would indicate he's been AWOL since I was about 2yrs old. Never got the whole story on the incident that made my mama finally tell him to kick rocks, but I do know he kicked every last one of em and kept on kicking for the next eleven years. That's when his father died and his sister brought me around for the funeral, after having sought me out the year before to introduce me to the family I never knew. I met my grandfather once, he gave me twenty dollars, and then he died. Day of the funeral, turkey baster approaches me: "Do you know who I am?" I reply, "Yes." His clip is empty so he simply walks away. But I got an email today.
Funerals are uncomfortable enough without people whispering about you. They're even worse when the woman who was married to your father when he impregnated your mother doesnt even pretend not to hate you. If looks could kill, I'd be a ghostwriter for real. But whats this - an email?
At least he called sometimes after that. Not often or regularly, but sometimes - at least until I was about seventeen. Havent seen or heard from him since. But then I got this email today.
Fast forward five years later. My sister (his daughter) got sick with TB. I went to visit her in the hospital, having built a relationship with her since the first visits, but she didnt want me to see her in the way she was. It hurt, but I respected her wishes and left. A few hours later, just before flying back upstate, I sat in my aunt's kitchen while she spoke to the turkey baster on the phone, 3 feet away. She tried to get him to talk to me, mentioning my sadness at what had happened, but he wouldnt. You know what he said? "I dont wanna make her miss her flight." Oh..... thanks. How considerate of you. And today I get an email.
Adding insult to injury, my sister died a month later. I couldnt go to the funeral because the woman that was married to my father when he impregnated my mother wouldnt have it. With not even an attempt on his part to talk some sense into her - by all accounts - they put her in the ground without me. I had to make my own peace and none of it made any sense. Since then, not a phone call, not a letter, not a smoke signal, not a carrier pigeon, not a message passed, not anything. Then I get an email today.
My other sister from him and some of my cousins and I reunited via FB last year. Over the summer, I missed a family cookout being held an hour away from the hotel I was in that day in Manhattan. No word about it until the last minute, but honestly I probably wouldnt have gone anyway. Got home to find a picture sent to me by one of my cousins - my aunt, my uncle and the turkey baster. I looked at the picture and saw a lot of things, but my "father" wasnt one of them. But hey, Ive got mail!
A month or two ago, I reconnected with another cousin, who told me he now lives in Detroit, near her. "Wonderful," I say, not caring IF he lived, let alone WHERE. She said she talks to him all the time and had been trying to get him to reach out to me. For what? If he needs to be convinced, I'm not interested. She went to bat for him - he's afraid, he doesnt know what to say, and all the other things that were supposed to soften me up. I couldnt even pretend to care - like father like daughter. She told me she gave him my email address, which I can only assume was because a phone call might be too much like.... adult. So today, I got this email.
And you know, I started to think, in talking to her, maybe I ought to confront the issues if he's willing to man up about them. Maybe it will cause me to feel something - SOMETHING. Some resentment, some anger, SOMETHING. All these years, I havent. All these years, in my heart, he simply didnt exist. I opened up to the possibility of finally putting to rest all the things that brought me to this point with him - getting to ask the questions, even though I know I wont like most of the answers. But then I got this email. You know what it said?
"Havent heard from you in a while."
Havent heard from you in a while. Thats it. Open heart surgery, a car accident, a college graduation, a sister's death, two kids, and seventeen years, and thats all I got. I stared at the screen for a while, like more words were gonna appear any second. But thats all I got.
Thats all I got.
Holla at Ya Girl
Ok so I guess I gotta give advice LOL. At least, thats the request I received from a friend of mine, who misses reading about the people I tend to know whose lives are real-life Maury shows LOL. Dont get it twisted, "Staring Into The Camera" is not turning into an advice column, by any means, however, I guess that is a big part of why random people know me, so I've gotta occasionally appease those thirsty for other people's drama LOL. Got an issue? Want an opinion? Holla at ya girl.
doctordig9@gmail.com
Now... I need help too.
I keep having this same damn dream and its starting to annoy the fuck outta me. Let me back up - its not the same dream, its the same ending of a dream. I will dream about whatever the hell I dream about and then at the end, I always find myself in some big building that looks like a lobby to a bank or office building or something. As Im about to leave, me and whoever Im with realize its 4 or 5 o'clock (cant remember which) and that we are on a street called McArthur or McCarthy (again, cant remember) Park, and on this street, at the same time every day, there is a shootout. We make a run for it and I always end up getting separated from the person/people Im with. On at least two occasions, they wound up shot. Dont know if they died, I kept going. I remember once having one or both of my kids with me and I literally carried them with me. The weirdest part about the whole sequence is that I never finish it. I always wake up in the midst of running and hiding behind columns and dumpsters, trying to get home - or at least outta there LOL. And Im not sure but I think Im always with someone different too.
I have this little bullshit link I go to sometimes when I have a weird dream, and it usually helps me understand it by breaking down the elements of it. It was of absolutely no help today LOL. So Im wondering if anybody out there has any ideas or suggestions about where I should look. Email me if ya do.
Little stuff I've started to put together that may or may not be relevant:
My boss's last name is McCarthy and I (technically) get off work at 5:00.
MacArthur Park is the place on a Philly episode of The Fresh Prince of Bel Air, that was supposed to be dangerous. IDK why that would be relevant, Im just sayin LOL.
Me carrying one of the midgets with me - that's pretty obvious, I think.
Never getting where Im going - that could be literal (Im a procrastinator LOL) - but then again, I just might not be ready to finish the dream yet. I might have to force a finish in order for it to stop. I think I heard that about recurring dreams.
The shootout .... well.... the dream site said when Im being shot at, I feel under fire or some confrontation in my waking life - that I feel I am being victimized in a certain situation. That could be true, of late, with my mama. Did I mention how every time she falls out with somebody, she tells everyone she can possibly tell, trying to get people on her side? Yeah, one of those. Lets say I was a little less than thrilled to have my sister hitting me up from outta state asking me about some shit that only exists in my mother's mind. Damn, how long have I been dreaming this sequence? Its probably been a week, give or take. Hmmmmm......
doctordig9@gmail.com
Now... I need help too.
I keep having this same damn dream and its starting to annoy the fuck outta me. Let me back up - its not the same dream, its the same ending of a dream. I will dream about whatever the hell I dream about and then at the end, I always find myself in some big building that looks like a lobby to a bank or office building or something. As Im about to leave, me and whoever Im with realize its 4 or 5 o'clock (cant remember which) and that we are on a street called McArthur or McCarthy (again, cant remember) Park, and on this street, at the same time every day, there is a shootout. We make a run for it and I always end up getting separated from the person/people Im with. On at least two occasions, they wound up shot. Dont know if they died, I kept going. I remember once having one or both of my kids with me and I literally carried them with me. The weirdest part about the whole sequence is that I never finish it. I always wake up in the midst of running and hiding behind columns and dumpsters, trying to get home - or at least outta there LOL. And Im not sure but I think Im always with someone different too.
I have this little bullshit link I go to sometimes when I have a weird dream, and it usually helps me understand it by breaking down the elements of it. It was of absolutely no help today LOL. So Im wondering if anybody out there has any ideas or suggestions about where I should look. Email me if ya do.
Little stuff I've started to put together that may or may not be relevant:
My boss's last name is McCarthy and I (technically) get off work at 5:00.
MacArthur Park is the place on a Philly episode of The Fresh Prince of Bel Air, that was supposed to be dangerous. IDK why that would be relevant, Im just sayin LOL.
Me carrying one of the midgets with me - that's pretty obvious, I think.
Never getting where Im going - that could be literal (Im a procrastinator LOL) - but then again, I just might not be ready to finish the dream yet. I might have to force a finish in order for it to stop. I think I heard that about recurring dreams.
The shootout .... well.... the dream site said when Im being shot at, I feel under fire or some confrontation in my waking life - that I feel I am being victimized in a certain situation. That could be true, of late, with my mama. Did I mention how every time she falls out with somebody, she tells everyone she can possibly tell, trying to get people on her side? Yeah, one of those. Lets say I was a little less than thrilled to have my sister hitting me up from outta state asking me about some shit that only exists in my mother's mind. Damn, how long have I been dreaming this sequence? Its probably been a week, give or take. Hmmmmm......
Monday, May 3, 2010
This Bitch...
My bad yall, I been meaning to come in here all day, but every time I got ready to, this bitch at work was sending me an email. I cant even remember WTF I was originally gonna come talk about.
Scenario:
Bitch use to be my admin. The department restructured and now she's not, however, my account contacts arent all aware of this change yet, so they will occasionally still call or email her to do things for them. At this point, she's got two choices: either help em, or redirect them to me. Bitch decides she aint helping nobody. Fine. Just redirect em. Simple enough, right?
So this broad gets an email from one of my customers on Friday. FRIDAY. She replies to their email and copies me AND MY BOSS in, saying she doesnt handle my accounts anymore, and to contact me directly. Fine. "Yeah I'll call him." I called the guy and got his voicemail, but I didnt leave a message, because I intended to just try him back. As my days sometimes have it, it got busy and I didnt get a chance to call again.
This morning, another email, this time TO the customer, again copying in my boss. "Im sorry she did not call you....." (etc, etc) Bitch, what?
Me: "I called him, but didnt get him. I'll try him again after I get off this conference call.
Do you know this bitch emailed me again an hour later, AGAIN copying in my boss: "Did you call the customer yet? I just want to make sure I can close out this issue on my end." Close out WHAT issue on your end? You dont have an end LOL. You were never helping him, you were just handing it off to me. I didnt even reply to her shit, because by that point, there was nearly no way that I was gonna be able to keep it professional.
One, you sent me the initial email on FRIDAY AFTERNOON. Not only was it FRIDAY AFTERNOON, it was the last day of the month, which you know like I know is ALWAYS a madhouse. He lucky I even got a chance to call him initially, the fact that I couldnt get back to him again should be nobody's surprise. Two, are you really emailing me again at 9am on Monday morning? Bitch, we dont work weekends, which means, essentially, it has not even been 24 hours. Three, if you gonna hand some shit off to me, HAND IT OFF. Dont keep emailing me, asking me bout some shit, cause like you keep reminding me, you dont handle my accounts anymore. Go file your damn nails and mind your fuckin business. And stop copying my boss like him being on the email is gonna change my actions. I will get to it when I fucken get to it - he is not my only customer. "Oh I just copied him in because if you were unable to get to the customer, he might have asked another person to call him."
*staring into the camera*
Its MY customer. Why in the fuck would he ask somebody else to call him? Dont be fucken stupid all your life, ok? And stop talking to me like IM stupid. You know good and damn well thats not why you copied him in. Dont piss on my leg and tell me its raining, how bout that?
Fucken ass. Ugh!
Scenario:
Bitch use to be my admin. The department restructured and now she's not, however, my account contacts arent all aware of this change yet, so they will occasionally still call or email her to do things for them. At this point, she's got two choices: either help em, or redirect them to me. Bitch decides she aint helping nobody. Fine. Just redirect em. Simple enough, right?
So this broad gets an email from one of my customers on Friday. FRIDAY. She replies to their email and copies me AND MY BOSS in, saying she doesnt handle my accounts anymore, and to contact me directly. Fine. "Yeah I'll call him." I called the guy and got his voicemail, but I didnt leave a message, because I intended to just try him back. As my days sometimes have it, it got busy and I didnt get a chance to call again.
This morning, another email, this time TO the customer, again copying in my boss. "Im sorry she did not call you....." (etc, etc) Bitch, what?
Me: "I called him, but didnt get him. I'll try him again after I get off this conference call.
Do you know this bitch emailed me again an hour later, AGAIN copying in my boss: "Did you call the customer yet? I just want to make sure I can close out this issue on my end." Close out WHAT issue on your end? You dont have an end LOL. You were never helping him, you were just handing it off to me. I didnt even reply to her shit, because by that point, there was nearly no way that I was gonna be able to keep it professional.
One, you sent me the initial email on FRIDAY AFTERNOON. Not only was it FRIDAY AFTERNOON, it was the last day of the month, which you know like I know is ALWAYS a madhouse. He lucky I even got a chance to call him initially, the fact that I couldnt get back to him again should be nobody's surprise. Two, are you really emailing me again at 9am on Monday morning? Bitch, we dont work weekends, which means, essentially, it has not even been 24 hours. Three, if you gonna hand some shit off to me, HAND IT OFF. Dont keep emailing me, asking me bout some shit, cause like you keep reminding me, you dont handle my accounts anymore. Go file your damn nails and mind your fuckin business. And stop copying my boss like him being on the email is gonna change my actions. I will get to it when I fucken get to it - he is not my only customer. "Oh I just copied him in because if you were unable to get to the customer, he might have asked another person to call him."
*staring into the camera*
Its MY customer. Why in the fuck would he ask somebody else to call him? Dont be fucken stupid all your life, ok? And stop talking to me like IM stupid. You know good and damn well thats not why you copied him in. Dont piss on my leg and tell me its raining, how bout that?
Fucken ass. Ugh!
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