Shenanigans!

Ima get to the job stuff in a minute but first, lets talk about this fool I met yesterday LOL

Lord be a fence.....

I told yall I met this guy on the train yesterday. He was texting me the second I left his sight and continued to do so, on and off, for the rest of the day. I thought it was kinda cool, you know? He's really interested.

So he gives me some time to get my homework out the way last night and then he calls. A lot of "getting to know you" stuff, you know the shit you ask when you just meet a person.... but his relationship questions are like.... hardbody LOL. Like.... he's serious LOL. He's like be there for him, give him what he needs and he'll take care of everything. Cool, I can dig that. I came out of that conversation with the understanding that he wants us to focus exclusively on us. Aight, I can dig that too. Less drama that way anyway LOL.... (I hate myself right now, that is soooooo not the point LOL).

Anyway, we agree to see each other tonight. We're texting today and Im like "so whats the plan?" (He's confused) "The plan. You know, what are we doing, where are we going.... the plan." (He's still confused. He thought he told me last night) "Ok then refresh me because Im pretty sure we didnt cover that." This fool gon say to me that I need to do whatever he needs me to do LOL.

*record scratch*

Im sorry, what? LOL

Now the texts are slowing down by this point because now I have to pause in between responses to react to the bullshit he's saying to me. You know these infamous facial expressions of mine sometimes take a second to match up with the thoughts in my head at this level of fuckery LOL.

I just met this guy, but he's cool. Likeable. Maybe we're just having some kind of miscommunication, so I say just that: "I think maybe there's been some kind of miscommunication. I dont think we're on the same page." Clearly he thought I was UNCLEAR and asking for clarification, which came in the form of "I need all that good loven. And you dont have to pay no bills."

I swear on everything. Im looking at the text right now, those were his exact words LMAO! Fuck is wrong with this ni..... *sighhhhhhhhhh*

I "What? LOL" because clearly he couldnt be serious. Ohhhhhhhh but he was LOL. He had the nerve to repeat what he said and then follow it up with "I need you to send me a list of everything." Oh nigga, now Im a whore with homework? Where they do that at? LMAO!

I couldnt muster enough of anything inside me to actually become angry. In fact, I found it quite amusing how wrong the tree was he was barking up, so much so that I actually was nice in my replies. I mighta been too nice - I dont think he realized I was saying "you know you just fucked up right?" LOL But here's the kicker... Im checking for confirmation every time he says something to make sure Im clear on the fact that he's asking me to be his personal prostitute and he confirms each step of the way and did not see why Houston was having a problem. I said "Sweetie, if youre looking for somebody who would be good with that arrangement, Im sorry to tell you you stopped the wrong woman on that train." This nigga goes "See, I knew you was going to take it the wrong way."

*staring into the camera*

LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! This cant be life. Where are the cameras? I cant take it anymore.

For real though? #Comeonson!

I had to end the conversation. It was starting to make me stupid. I felt brain cells dying LOL.

The crazy part now is thinking back to our conversation last night and applying this new information to the ideas I thought meant something else. He was having a completely different conversation than I was LOL.

He called while I was in the other room, so I missed it, and Im glad. Now is not the time to talk to him, if I ever do again. I dont know, maybe he's actually had "relationships" like that. Do people do that, like in real life? LOL I guess they do, my girl said they do. *shrugs* In retrospect, a lotta bitches is fuckin for free so...... a little change in perspective and...... fuck that shit, this nigga crazy LOL.

I got bout 20 more minutes of laughing on the inside, but before I continue to do so............. the job I mentioned a buncha blogs back is the one I was offered today. Notwithstanding the fact that in 6 months I could be singing a whole new tune (lol), right now, it sounds perfect. The earning potential is BANANAS! So my intent is to hit the ground running so I can start peeling that shit ASAP. I always wanted to work on Wall St. Now I can actually cross that off my list. Wow. And a week ago I didnt even have a job. I guess God decided I needed a week off to get my mind right.

But now Im curious why I really got off that train yesterday..... LOL

*shrugs*

Ah well.