My Nephew Dropped a Bomb On Me

So I found out today that my nephew is getting married. NEXT WEEK LOL.

*sigh*

I was dumbfounded at first. FLOORED. He's 22 and has never even SEEN a successful relationship, let alone had one. Just in the last few months, his FB statuses have indicated that his mind was still all over the place, but when I talked to him today, he said he loves her and knows that he will never want to be with anyone else. I told him that was cool, but that he should realize that he doesnt have to be married to her to prove that. He said he knew that but just wanted to do things the right way and not continue to be living in sin LOL

*staring into the camera*

Living in sin? Really? You gonna try to play me like that, money? LOL He started telling me how much he loves her and she is so different than the other girls he has dealt with and "Auntie, she asked me what my 10-yr plan was. Nobody has ever asked me that before." Ok. "She wouldnt even have sex with me right away, she aint wanna be giving her body to me just to be giving it to me. We didnt have sex for like a month."

*staring into the camera* and LMAO!

A month, huh? She GOTS to be the one LOL. *smh* I dont know his girl but from what I was told, she is 23, with a five and two-year old, own place and car. Thats all I know. My nephew is 22, with a (I think) four-year old and neither of them other two, but is apparently living with her now. So I dig a little bit and find out how long they have been "together"..... four months.

*staring into the camera*

Ok. So if he was just 22, I might not have said so much. If he were older and it had been only four months, I might not have said so much. But he is 22 AND they have only been together four months. That is a recipe for disaster.

Nobody really knows at 22 that they wanna spend the rest of their life with somebody. They definitely dont know after only four months. I been with my baby for the same amount of time and we have kicked around the idea of marriage, but having been through some real shit in our lives, we know we need wait a little longer and make sure we are sure. You dont know that at 22. So then Im like well ok, he's convinced that she is the one. Fine, but why so fast? Why it gotta be next weekend? And somehow the words came out, without me even really thinking about it: "I mean, what, is she pregnant?" "Yeah, just a couple weeks."

*staring into the camera*

First of all, I was really only kinda joking when I asked kinda LOL.... I didnt expect him to say yes. And I sort of get the feeling he threw in that "couple weeks" so it wouldnt look like the pregnancy was the reason for the microwave nuptials, since he told me they decided to get married a month ago, but I was born AT night, not LAST night LOL.

He told me how they met and proceeded to tell me how I was right in saying that if he stopped looking for love it would find him. He told me I am always right - just like I was right about his son's mother - but it didnt seem to dawn on him that I might be right about this being too soon to marry this girl. I hope to God that this is the one time I'm wrong.

I told him they should take a couple of months, at least, and just enjoy being engaged. Just give it time to breathe. I explained how much harder it will be to separate himself from her if he finds he was wrong about her being the one. I told him that he doesnt have to marry this girl to prove that he is a stand-up guy and that he loves this girl, but I know he is always going to do what he wants to do. There is no changing his mind once its made up.

I have no doubt that he will at least think about the things I said to him, but when its all said and done, he will probably still be at that gazebo outside my mom's house next Saturday. So I told him that no matter what he does, I love him and will always have his back, and I am genuinely happy that he has found someone he believes in....... and then I begged him some more to wait LOL.

He wont. I know it. But damn.

It's his life. Far be it from me to try to tell him what to do. I'm just trying to keep him from making a painful and costly mistake.

When I think back to 22, I thought I knew what was best for me. Most people wouldnt believe such a thing exists, but he is a lot more stubborn than I am LOL. I didnt make a horrible choice at 22 though, I must say. It didnt work out, but I had four out of six good years LOL. If I knew then what I know now, I might not have made the same choice though, and that's all I was trying to convey to him. Alas, he is grown at 22, and we cant place degrees on adulthood at some times, and then dictate 18 or 21 is go-time at others. He is grown, and he will do what he wants to do. Im his favorite aunt, and I will continue to be so.... even at the divorce proceedings in three years.....

*sigh*

Where's my damn glass.......