21 Years a Slave

And no, that's not a typo.

Might not mean anything to you but I have been wearing this thing for 21 years. Let me be clear; I have worn this thing EVERY DAY for the last 21 years..... sleeping, showering, fighting, swimming, childbirth..... I don't care what it was I was doing, I was doing it in this. Wait..... I did have to take it off when I played ball in school - they made me - but it went right back on after every game and other than then, it literally never left my neck. This morning I decided it was time to let it go. I slid the plate off the chain, replaced it with my daughter's Tasmanian devil pendant and gave it to her for her 12th birthday.

I didn't plan to retire it although the thought had crossed my mind a while ago. As I matured, I found myself wanting to experiment with different neck pieces I'd see, so I'd buy them just to have them sitting in a box or on a hook somewhere, collecting dust. My name plate comes with so many memories - it appears in every post-high school picture I have ever taken before December 20th, 2013 - and I wasn't even consciously thinking about all that. I just could never bring myself to take it off; like psychologically, the thought of taking it off made me uncomfortable. Then I had surgery.

I was instructed to remove ALL my jewelry which included other articles I never take off - a second chain, a 3rd hole stud, an ankle bracelet and a navel ring - all of which I've been rocking for at least 15 years each. Is that crazy? I never thought so. It was always just... part of me. But for some reason, this morning I felt like I felt the day I bought that e-cig out the blue and quit smoking; it's now or never. If I put this thing back on, it will be another 21 years before I take it off again. My baby walked in the room and I felt like it was what I was supposed to do. I'm not even gonna lie, it was kind of an emotional moment. But I do think I saw it coming. Yesterday I made an attempt to put my navel ring back in and it fought me to no end. No matter how much progress I felt I was making on the front end, it would not push through to the other side. I eventually gave up and said I would try again another day, but part of me felt that tug of symbolism then. You've been FREED from these things, why would you wanna put them back on? The events of the last few days caused me to get a lot more out of it than just that too. You've been freed from these PEOPLE, why would you wanna put THEM back on? Hmmph. Yall don't hear me. But as I bid farewell to the 2 new pieces now resigned to my jewelry box, farewell also to the first 2 casualties of 2014 whose walking papers have been signed, sealed, delivered - and in that very order.

#POW #ItsBeenReal #Toodles

Leave it to me to overthink some real simple shit into a life lesson but you'll have to forgive me. Lately everything happening around me feels like one. I'll say it again - none of this might mean anything to you, but for me..... its kind of a big deal. Especially the correlation. The sentimental person I am likes to hold on to things, but even more so, people. That has been HUGELY to my detriment over the years - if you follow this blog, you know LOL. The lesson for me to have learned here is that just because a person doesn't mean you harm doesn't mean they mean you any good. Dead weight just keeps you from moving ahead at the pace you could be. Oddly enough, even the recent terminations my company did are relevant (oh yeah, they let go like 20 people, including my boss AND her boss). If a company is in danger, it lets people go. Who? Those who have not demonstrated that they deserve to stay.

Ima say that again. Who now? Those who have not demonstrated that they deserve to stay.

Yall still dont hear me, Ima get on down off this pulpit LOL...........

But you know.... its a name plate. I got it in the 90s and although [grown] people are still rocking them today, maybe grown women in name plates is kinda like grown ass men in cornrows. If that's the case, I just did myself a HUGE solid LOL.